Irkens Don't Feel Love
by AgentPoltergeist
Summary: Invader Kezzi Has come to Earth...with her sister, Tak! She is determined to help Tak take over the world, but what happens when Tak is developing feelings for her worst enemy? ZATR
1. Reunion

Chapter 1: Family Reunion

Far above Earth's atmosphere, past the satellites and avoiding detection, a small, silver spacecraft zoomed through the blackness. Powerful cameras had been installed on the outside of the craft and were surveying the blue and green planet's surface. The ship held high-tech alien engineering, powerful weapons, and one smallish but quite angry pilot and her robot.

The pilot looked over the screens displaying the cameras' views of the planet below them. She was growing increasingly frustrated as they revealed no sign of who she was searching for. Losing her temper altogether, she shouted, "I'VE HAD IT WITH THIS! Ten years, Phobos," she said, addressing her robot companion, "Ten whole years of searching, and not a sign of her in this whole bloody galaxy!"

She continued to monitor the screens, pulling on her silky antennae with anxiety. Phobos asked tentatively, "If I may be so bold, Mistress, I'm wondering how much longer we should keep up this search."

She whirled around to glare at her robot. A blue spark darted across her silver eyes in much the way it did with her sister. Phobos shrank back. She muttered, "There is _no way_ we are turning back now. She's been missing for fifty years, and we have looked almost everywhere she could possibly be. I could scarcely believe it when she was reported missing, just disappeared off the face of Planet Dirt. I'm breaking all sorts of laws doing this, of course, but she's my sister. I could care less what the Tallest tell me to do in this situation. As a matter of fact, I'm getting sick of following their orders anyway. If that makes me a Defective, well, then," she said bitterly, "I don't really care to be normal."

Suddenly, a high pitched signal sounded from the radar screen. She looked over to see a purple blip on the screen coming towards the gray triangle that represented her ship at an incredible pace. She looked out the windshield, and sure enough, there was a tiny purple craft about half the size of their ship careening towards them. Alarmed, the pilot threw the ship into reverse to avoid a collision. Then she got a better look at the craft. Was it a trick of the eyes? No, the pod was definitely Irken technology. She backed the ship up to the pod as close as she could so as to allow any passengers to board. There was a hissing noise as the airlocks on both crafts opened, and a thud as the other Irken boarded the ship. Phobos raced to the back to help. The pilot followed, and was struck dumb by what she saw.

An Irken that looked almost exactly like her had crawled into the ship, except she wore purple instead of black, her eyes were purple instead of silver, and her antennae were curled in back, while the pilot's had three long zigzag shapes. She noticed that the Irken had a SIR unit with her. The four stood staring at each other for several moments, and then the one in black ran forward and grabbed the other in a huge hug. Through her tears, she said, "I missed you so much."

When she let go, the other said sort of dazedly, "Kezzi? Is that you?"

The pilot grinned. "Yes, Tak. It's good to see you again. Why were you in that escape pod?"

Tak's eyes narrowed in rage. "It's all _his_ fault," she hissed.

Her sister asked, "Whose fault? What happened?"

Tak related the entire incident, from her escape off of Planet Dirt to how Zim, a notorious Irken troublemaker, had tried to get her to be his 'love pig' and ended up thwarting her plot for world domination. Kezzi had definitely heard of Zim before-there were few Irkens who hadn't. He had caused a planet-wide blackout when he was just a newborn Smeet, and went on to ruin The Tallests' plan for galactic conquest, Impending Doom 1. She hadn't heard the latest news about him, however. She asked incredulously, "Zim is down there? Trying to take over that planet?"

Tak replied, "Yes, but he's doing a god-awful job of it. But because he seems to have all the luck in the world, only two humans know his true identity. And one of them doesn't even care."

Kezzi thought for a moment. "So, you have a human disguise? Can I see it?

Tak pressed a button on the device attached to one side of her head, and all at once, her appearance melted into that of an ordinary Earth child. Her skin turned a whitish-pinkish color, she grew deep blue hair, and her purple eyes transformed into heavy-lidded ones with purple irises. Her SIR unit morphed into a black cat. Kezzi was very impressed. She couldn't tell the difference between her and any other human. She asked, "Could I get a disguise like that?"

Tak gave her a funny look but said, "Sure. I've got a spare Disguise Simulator here somewhere…" she dug around in her pocket and took out a small device. "You just clamp that to your head and a pair of goggles will come out. Then you use the buttons on the side of the goggles to scan through disguise options. But, why do you need this?"

Kezzi smiled mischievously. "I think you deserve another try at taking over this dirty rock. And this time, you'll have a little help from the family."

Tak looked surprised, and then gave a horrid grin. "I like the way you think, Sis."

With that, the two sped off toward the planet beneath them, with an ingenious plot unfolding in their twin minds.


	2. Grand Arrival

Chapter 2: Grand Arrival

Several hours later, a day began like any other day for Dib Membrane. He woke up to the sound of his alarm clock's high-pitched beeping and groggily hit the button to silence it. He got out of bed and checked his e-mail. Scanning his inbox, he found a message from the Swollen Eyeball Network. He opened it up, and read,

Greetings, Agent Mothman:

I am writing to inform you of a new member of the Swollen Eyeball Network. Her codename is Agent Poltergeist. The reason I am e-mailing you specifically is that she wanted to meet you. I believe she said something about wanting to meet the only other agent her age. I suggested that she enroll in your Skool. She will be starting today in your classroom. Tell me how the meeting goes. Best of luck to you.

Agent Darkbootie

Dib raised an eyebrow. It was unusual for Darkbootie to send out a personal e-mail. Vaguely he wondered what the new member was like as he went to wake up Gaz. He knocked on her door, and then entered. Her stereo was blasting Three Days Grace's Riot at top volume while Gaz was drying her hair. Upon seeing Dib in her bedroom doorway, she threw her alarm clock and a hefty textbook at him. She screeched, "IF YOU WANNA KEEP ALL YOUR LIMBS, GET OUT NOW!"

Dodging the objects, Dib fled from the room and into the kitchen. He sat down at the table and poured himself a bowl of Frankenchokies. The rest of the morning was routine: brush teeth, pack up bags, say goodbye to Dad on one of the hoverscreens, and head out. As he walked along the sidewalks with Gaz trailing several feet behind him, immersed in her GameSlave, he saw the familiar green-skinned boy on the other side of the street. He couldn't resist the urge to gloat. Dib crossed the street and walked up to his archenemy. "So, Zim," he said, smirking, "I bet you'll be interested to know that my secret organization has gained a new agent! It won't be long before you're hopelessly outnumbered."

Zim turned around and glared at him. "Me? Outnumbered? RIDICULOUS! Tell me the name of this new agent, or face a horrible demise at the Zim hands of ZIM!" he shouted, thrusting a finger in Dib's face.

Dib pushed the finger away. "All I know is that her codename is Agent Poltergeist. I don't even know what she looks like. But it doesn't matter. She's coming to our skool today! We're all united under one cause: defeating your kind, Zim!"

Zim's eyes narrowed. "Nonsense! I will destroy this agent-worm, or at least make her one of my devoted minions! I will! FEAR ME!"

He ran off to skool screaming. Dib scowled after him. It just about wore him out every day, yelling at Zim. It had been two years since Zim had shown up on Earth, when Dib was just twelve, and Gaz was nine. Zim had come close to winning the battle once or twice, and he had a few occasional minor victories, like the time he fired a water balloon the size of the skool at the town. But the Earth was still safe, and completely ignorant. Dib ran off to skool, eager to meet the new agent.

"And so," Ms. Bitters was saying as Dib entered the classroom, "The Black Death will inevitably return one day to wreak havoc and disease on the modern world and it's weakened immune system."

She looked up at Dib. "Dib! You're late. If it happens again, I'm transferring you to the underground classroom."

"Yes, Ms. Bitters," he said glumly as he took his seat. Ms. Bitters continued with her morbid lesson when the phone on her desk rang. She picked it up and listened. "Another one? Ugh…and a returning one? Oh, alright,"

She slammed the phone down. A door opened under it, and it was engulfed in flames. She announced to the class, "Children, we have another useless addition to the student body, as well as one coming back to us."

As she spoke two girls entered. To Zim's horror, and Dib's surprise, it was Tak. Zim was about to start screaming when another girl walked in. She had jet black hair in a smooth, chin-length bob, and she had dark eyeliner around her light silver eyes. She wore a gray Band Tee and baggy black jeans. "Hi," she said, in a slight English accent, "My name's Kezzi." Her piercing silver eyes fixed straight on Dib. He felt whole face turning red.

For the first time in his life Zim found himself at a total loss for words. He didn't know who he was more shocked to see, Kezzi or Tak. He had obliterated Tak almost a year ago, he was sure of it. So why was she standing in front of him now? And this girl was undoubtedly the new agent the Dib-beast had spoken of. This would never do. She had to be destroyed, as well as Tak, for good this time.

Tak said, "My father's business with the Deelishus Weenie Corporation took him overseas, so we were gone for a while, but now I've returned to this hideous skool. I'm glad to see everyone!"

"Take your seats now, girls," ordered Ms. Bitters. Tak took her seat next to Zim, and Kezzi next to Dib, who looked like he might pass out. "Our next lesson is about the inevitable implosion of the entire universe. Turn to page 1372 in your textbooks…"

Zim wasn't paying attention. He kept thinking of his plan to get rid of Tak-and Kezzi-once and for all.


	3. Lunchtime

Chapter 3: Lunchtime

After a long, depressing lecture, the lunch bell finally rang. Zim ran to the cafeteria as fast as he could, hoping to get away from his newly returned enemy. Dib, Gaz, Tak, and Kezzi just walked after him. When they reached the cafeteria, they filled their trays with the unrecognizable sludge that was their lunch and sat down right next to Zim. He winced and looked away.

Kezzi was the first to speak. "So, Dib," she said suddenly, making Dib inhale a bit of milk and turn bright red. "Y-Yes?" he said, coughing.

"As you may have guessed, I'm Agent Poltergeist. I'm glad to meet you. At first I never thought I'd see you in person, but Darkbootie suggested I enroll here. Your codename is Agent Mothman, right?"

He blinked for a moment and said, "That's right. I'm, uh, glad to meet you too. We don't get new members very often."

Kezzi smiled and said, "It's a shame, too. The paranormal is fascinating. It's good to meet someone who shares my interests."

Dib just nodded dumbly and blushed even harder.

Meanwhile, Zim was glaring at Tak as though he were about to bite her. She finally returned the gaze, and the two had a staring match until the silence grew uncomfortable. Finally Zim couldn't take it anymore and shouted, "OK, Tak-beast! What are you planning? Why have you returned to this horrible ball of dirt that is rightfully MINE?"

Tak seemed not to know what to say. She shifted in her seat a bit and then said, "I returned to say…I give up."

Zim's jaw dropped. Dib stared. Gaz actually looked up.

Zim said weakly, "Give up? But…why?"

Tak replied, looking at her shoes, "Well, Kezzi is a friend I've made here, and I told her that you and I have…a few issues. She said that, well, we should put it behind us."

"Yeah," said Kezzi, "Grudges never turn out well for anyone."

Zim gaped. "So…you just want to stop fighting?"

She nodded. "I was stuck in that escape pod for almost a year. I originally wanted to tear you limb from limb, but Kezzi told me it wouldn't get me anywhere. So, I just decided to throw in the towel, so to speak."

Something occurred to Zim suddenly. "Wait, Tak. Does Kezzi know about you being, you know…"

Tak said, "Yes. She saw me without my disguise one day. Any other human might have just ignored it, but she knew what I was. She didn't freak out, though, or report me to the Swollen Eyeball to have me dissected. She's a good friend."

Zim yelled, "Irkens have no need for friends! Have you no pride in your species? Are you a Defective?"

Kezzi asked bluntly, "You're an Irken too, aren't you Zim?"

Zim stopped cold as he realized that he had just completely blown his cover. Dib yelled, "YES! This is it, Kezzi! A Swollen Eyeball member who sees him for what he really is! We can be a team! We have to take him to the Network right-"

"Whoa, who said anything about turning him in?"

Dib stopped his rant, not sure if he had heard her right. He turned around to face Kezzi. "W-what?"

Kezzi said earnestly, "Listen. If it were anybody else, of course I'd report them. But I think of Zim as a friend." She looked at Zim. "And I never hurt a friend, no matter what."

Zim kind of deflated, because he could see that he wasn't in any immediate danger. Dib looked back and forth between Kezzi and Zim in shock and dismay. His one chance of exposing Zim had gone right down the drain. Kezzi, the amazing new girl, was on his side.

Kezzi then said to Dib, "But I hope this doesn't cause any problems, because," she smiled at him. "I like you, too."

The crimson shot up Dib's face again. Zim watched him curiously. "Why does the Dib-worm's giant head keep changing colors?"

Dib sulked and muttered, "Shut up."

Zim, not having heard him, said, "So, Tak is no longer the enemy of the amazing Zim? We are now friends?"

Tak chuckled and said, "Yes, Zim. We're friends."

Without warning, Zim grabbed Tak's hand and stood up on the lunch table. He yelled, "See, human worm-babies? I have made an alliance with the Tak! I have so many friends! So friendly and normal am I!"

The entire room just stared at him. Zim held the pose for a bit longer, then sat down meekly. Kezzi was watching the whole thing in a sort of amused way. She said, "You don't have to be so private about it."

Zim didn't know what she meant by that and just gave her a blank stare. She raised an eyebrow and said, "Don't they have sarcasm on your planet?"

Then she remembered the purple-haired girl named Gaz sitting a couple of seats down form her. She got out of her seat and walked up to her. The girl was completely absorbed in playing a handheld. Kezzi recognized the game she was playing and said, "Hi."

Not even looking up, she said, "Don't bother me. I'm in the zone."

Kezzi decided to give her some help with her game. "You could be playing that better, you know."

Gaz looked up at her. If looks could kill, Kezzi's body would be beyond identification. She said coldly, "Oh? How so?"

"You're attacking too early. If you press A while going over the bridge, it activates a shield that holds the vampire pigs off until you can fight them when they're weaker."

The group behind Kezzi stared at her in horror. It was bad enough to interrupt Gaz when she was gaming. To do so and then criticize her gaming was an act of pure madness. As Gaz rose from her chair menacingly, Dib wondered briefly if he would have to call 911 beforehand. All at once, Gaz set down her handheld, picked up her chair, and flung it with all her might at Kezzi. She neatly dodged it and leapt onto the table. Gaz followed and pegged two lunch trays at her. Kids all around were splattered with food and running around screaming. Kezzi ran for cover behind the trash cans as chairs, utensils, and trays were pegged at her. She grabbed a broom just in time to block a flying trash can. Gaz was not expecting to kick the garbage bin out of the way only to receive a broom handle in the stomach. She stumbled backwards and ducked to avoid Kezzi's swinging a broomstick around. She tried to run, but Kezzi caught up to her and jabbed a pressure point on her thigh with a handle. Gaz collapsed on her stomach in the middle of the floor. Kezzi quickly pinned her down, grabbed her head, and turned it about 90 degrees. "Your neck is one little twist away from snapping," she said viciously. "I win."

You could have heard a pin drop in the lunchroom. Kezzi was the first person ever to take on Gaz and win. Torque had tried it once and he wound up having to eat prescription soup for a month. With incredible calmness and confidence she had provoked a huge fight with the biggest Don't Screw With Me type girl in school, maybe the state-and she had won.

Kezzi got off of Gaz, and she stood up and looked the new girl straight in the eye. After a long, very tense silence, she said, "You're alright."

They shook hands, and then the bell rang. All the kids filed out of the cafeteria, and Kezzi went to walk with her new friends. Everybody seemed to like and accept her, and even admire her, after the latest episode. It was only her first day, and she was already fitting in perfectly.

Everything was going according to plan.


	4. Inside The Base

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You guys all get virtual waffles for the good reviews! Hee Hee

Chapter 4: Inside the Base

Finally, the skool bell rang, and kids streamed out of the building from the doors and windows. Zim caught up to the two girls and said, "Tak! I was just thinking that as a symbol of our newly formed alliance, you should come to my ingenious base. Perhaps we can share our technology so that we can take over this horrible earth-lump."

Tak stared at him, shocked at his blatant disregard for his own cover, and gave him a WTF look. Kezzi just laughed it off and said, "Zim, the only way you _could _take over the Earth is by getting some of Tak's technology."

Tak laughed with her, and Zim, chagrined, said, "SILENCE! You shall come with me, Kezzi-human, and be amazed at the incredible technology designed by the ZIM!"

Dib overheard, and ran over yelling, "You want to take Kezzi into your base? Oh, no. Don't go with him, Kezzi. He's trying to trick you! He'll put you in a tube and run horrible tests-"

"I think I'll be fine, Dib," said Kezzi. "If I can take out Gaz, then Zim won't be of any threat to me."

He looked reluctant, but agreed. "But I'm still coming with you," he insisted.

The four walked off to Zim's house. When they came to the bizarre, green-and-magenta building at the end of a cul-de-sac, Kezzi asked in wonderment, "Jeez, could you have made a more conspicuous base? You are seriously trying too hard with the I Heart Earth sign."

Zim shouted, "Make silence! Do not question my methods!"

Kezzi rolled her eyes and walked inside. Dib followed closely behind, looking around warily. "Don't worry, Kezzi. I know this place like the back of my hand. I won't let him hurt us. I'll bet you anything Tak and Zim are planning something, they're both Irken, after all."

Kezzi said, "It'll be fine, Dib. I don't think Zim has the skills to capture a raccoon, let alone two humans. I'm glad you're willing to protect me, though." She smiled at him.

For the umpteenth time that day Dib started blushing and stuttering. She just grabbed his hand and dragged him inside, which didn't help. All at once, a high-pitched squeal greeted them.

"HI MASTER! OOOH, YOU BROUGHT THE BIG-HEAD BOY! AND THE PURPLY GIRL! HIIII, PURPLYYY!"

A small SIR unit dressed in a green dog suit hurled himself at the visitors, latching on to Tak. Stumbling around, she pressed a button on her PAK and yelled, "MIMI! Come here!"

A moment later, a tiny dark blue tornado came through the open door. When it stopped, it looked like a cat with gleaming red eyes. The SIR unit on Tak squealed, "HI, MIMI!" and jumped over to her to give her a hug. When she could breathe again, Tak said, "This is my SIR unit, Mimi. And Zim, why on Irk don't you ever fix that deranged robot of yours?"

Zim said, "I did try to fix GIR once. But he went insane and tried to destroy an Earth library in his quest for knowledge. If the squidman hadn't been there to help…"

Zim broke off, shuddering. Tak shook her head. "Only you would cause that much trouble trying to fix a problem, Zim."

"SILENCE! I AM INGENIOUS!"

Kezzi asked Tak under her breath, "How many times does he plan to silence us in one day?"

"He does it 24/7," replied Tak.

GIR was sitting in front of the enormous TV screaming happily. "I love this show! It's the Scary Monkey Show! I like to watch the TV, and go through the channels with the controlly-thingy!"

He pressed random buttons on the remote, flipping through the hundreds of channels. Kezzi and Tak watched what they all held: one showed a talking sponge and his idiot starfish friend, another featured a bunch of fishermen on a ship in horrible weather and a bunch of bleeping noises, yet another showed a bunch of women and men designing dresses and other garments. No matter what it was, GIR always said, "I love this show…"

On one channel Tak asked, "What are they doing?"

The screen showed two humans in some sort of embrace. Dib explained, "They're kissing. It's something humans do when they love each other."

Zim exclaimed, "HAH! Irkens have no need for such weak-"

He was cut off by GIR squealing, "Awwww, they like each other! Just like Master and Purply!"

"WHAT!" they both yelled. GIR grabbed their heads and bent them together. "Master loves the purply girl! Maybe they should do the kissing so Purply'll love him, too!"

Zim blushed dark green, Tak bright red. He wrenched out of GIR's grasp and screamed, "Arrrgh, GIR!"

He chased the little robot in circles around the living room, GIR laughing maniacally the whole time. Kezzi started laughing and couldn't stop. Tak yelled at her to shut up, still flushed. Mimi picked up GIR and ran with him, Zim still chasing them. Kezzi had been told by Tak that Zim was disgusting and humans were worthless. But Kezzi thought Zim seemed harmless enough, and the hijinks that ensued whenever he mixed with humans were definitely amusing. Zim must have run out of breath, because GIR and Mimi appeared without him. GIR said, "IT'S LUNCHTIME! WE GONNA MAKE TACOS AND MUFFINS! MUFFINS! WHEEEEE!"

He ran into the kitchen with Mimi to make his idea of lunch. While he was preparing it with his friend, the four talked and bickered in the living room. Kezzi said, "I knew you would be interesting to hang out with, Zim. Somehow, wherever I go, I wind up making friends with the freaks. But you know, I think I'm happiest that way."

Dib said, "Well, you should be very happy here, because we're some of the freakiest people around."

He paused, and then, without any warning, he whirled around to the big fuchsia couch where Tak and Zim were sitting. "But I still don't trust either of you! You almost destroyed mankind last time you were here, Tak, and I'm not quite convinced you won't try again. Kezzi's a member of the club I'm in, so I'm going to trust her judgment, but I'll be watching. Very, very closely."

He stared meaningfully at Zim. He stared back and asked, "Why _does_ your head change colors when you speak to the Kezzi?"

Dib was spared answering by a loud explosion from the kitchen. They all raced inside to find half the kitchen covered in flour, grated cheese, and M&Ms. The stove was on fire, and GIR and Mimi were running around screaming. Dib grabbed a fire extinguisher and put out the stove, while Zim and Tak chased their SIR units around the kitchen. After about an hour, the mess was cleaned up and Zim let GIR out of the cage he had stuffed him in. Zim and the three guests walked to the front door to say goodbye. GIR ran to Mimi and hugged her again. "Bye, Mimi! Come back to play, 'kay?"

Zim said, "Goodbye, Earth-smellies. Feel grateful that I allowed you into my ingenious home and put up with your human stink. Now, begone!"

Kezzi said over her shoulder, "Yeah, yeah."

The three walked down the road a ways. When they came to Dib's street, he said, "So, I guess I'll see you guys next week, unless you want to get together over the weekend?"

Tak and Kezzi exchanged glances. "Yeah, maybe," said Tak.

"Okay, I'll get going then."

They said goodbye to the boy, and as soon as he was out of sight, Tak said excitedly, "You were great! They're completely fooled! Our plan will be ridiculously easy to carry out now!"

Kezzi said, "Don't get ahead of yourself. Dib still suspects you. We can't do anything with him watching you constantly. Step one is to gain their complete trust, remember. We need to build our friendships with them. Since Zim trusts you more, because he knows you're Irken, you should try to befriend him. I'll try befriending Dib."

Tak snorted. "You got the easy job. Dib is head-over-heels for you. And, you're a member of his secret organization. He completely trusts you. Zim doesn't trust anyone."

"You could maybe tell him you wanted to help him take over Earth."

Tak's eyes brightened. "Good idea," she said thoughtfully, "He'd love that. Plus, he actually has some decent weaponry. If I could get my hands on it, I would be able to take over Earth singlehandedly. I have no intention of working with him, of course."

"Naturally. Once you've gained his trust, you're going to turn right around and stab him in the back, preferably with a high-power laser, right?"

"Of course. Once he's out of the way, the Earth is ours for the taking, Kezzi. All we have to do is gain their trust…"

The two aliens in their flawless disguises walked along the road, discussing their evil plan. The best-laid of plans, however, can go completely wrong, especially when a change of heart and a flying moose is involved.


	5. Similarities

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HannahGee13, ClockwerkOrange, Black Dragon41, The Mortician's Daughter, Ninja 228,GazmRules, and KatLuvsPie(Formerly KatakaCandy) Enjoy Chapter 5!

Chapter 5: Similarities

On Saturday morning Kezzi woke up at the crack of dawn. She stumbled out of her bed and pressed a button on her PAK that sent a jolt of energy through her body, which helped her wake up. It was sort of the Irken equivalent of morning coffee. She yawned and said to her SIR unit, which was charging under the bed, "Phobos? Time to wake up."

A mechanical voice said, "Voice key accepted. Sleep mode deactivated." After a few beeps and whirrs, her SIR unit crawled out and said, it's eyes getting lighter and lighter gray as it warmed up, "Good morning mistress."

Kezzi said sleepily, "Yeah, good morning."

She walked over to the fridge and pulled out some type of Irken snack. Munching distractedly, she wondered how she would go about befriending Dib. To her surprise, she rather liked him. He was definitely much smarter than the rest of the humans. It seemed a shame to destroy him.

_No,_ she told herself, shaking off those weak feelings. He would have found out too much by the time the plan was put into effect. He would have to be terminated. It was especially risky because he was with the Swollen Eyeball Network, an organization dedicated to destroying her kind. No, she could not let any feelings get in the way of this operation. Done with her food, she walked into the elevator at the end of the room and went down to the third floor of her base.

The doors slid open to reveal what resembled a partially finished enormous medicine pill. Off to the side were two huge metal tanks of liquid. When the pill was finished, they would be pumped inside it to make a very deadly gas. It was basically a huge poison gas bomb. It was the key to the entire plot. Kezzi went back up the elevator to the first floor. She called to Phobos, "I'm leaving."

She pressed a button on her Disguise Simulator and transformed into an ordinary Earth girl. She walked out the door and down the street they were living on. They had chosen a neighborhood that was having many new houses built on it, so that the appearance of their base wouldn't seem so conspicuous. Kezzi looked up at the ruby red sky, at the trees, at the birds flying around. She had to admit, Earth was much prettier than Irk, which was choked with huge supercities, neon lights, and pollution. You could never see the sky for the flying advertisements. There was almost no such thing as silence there. And Kezzi seemed to be the only one bothered by this.

She got to the town and walked into Starbucks. She didn't ordinarily like Earth food, but she loved coffee. She was deciding what to order when she spotted a familiar, scythe-haired boy from behind.

"Dib!" she called out. Dib turned around and his eyes widened when he saw Kezzi standing there. He ran over to her and said, "Kezzi! I-I wasn't expecting-why are you-wh-what I mean is…uh, hi."

Kezzi studied him for a moment and laughed. "What's so funny?" asked Dib.

"You," she said between her giggles, "You blush and stammer all the time. It's cute."

"Uhhh," he was racking his brain for something to say. "How did you know I was here?" he blurted lamely.

"I didn't. I just walked in and saw you from behind, and I knew it was you."

He grumbled, "Let me guess, my big head was impossible to miss."

She gave him a strange look. "No, it was your hair. It's got a very unique shape."

Dib's mouth flopped open. "So, you don't think my head is big?"

Kezzi scrutinized his head and said, "Looks normal to me."

He felt like running in three directions. He began to splutter, "Really? REALLY? My head is normal? It's not gargantuan or the size of a hippo or anything? Seriously? You mean it?"

Kezzi had no clue why he was making such a fuss, but she just said, "Yeah, It's totally fine."

An idiotic smile stretched across Dib's face. He just said, "Wow…"

Suddenly the cashier said, "Hey, are you kids going to order or what?"

Startled, the two whirled around to order their drinks. A few minutes later, they sat down with their coffees and started talking. Kezzi said, "Why was it such a big deal that I didn't think your head was big?"

Dib sighed. "I don't really get it, but ever since I was I tiny kid everybody has said that my head is huge. You're the first person ever to say that it's normal."

Kezzi said, "I did notice that you seem to be something of an outcast. Are you not well-liked by the others?"

Dib replied, "Well, no. See, I've been into the paranormal for longer than I can even remember. But nobody else seems to care. Whenever I thought I saw a ghost, or a yeti, or anything like that, I would try to tell people about it, but they just called me crazy. It went on for years, and before long, I was all alone."

Kezzi felt terrible for him. "I know what it's like, feeling like nobody accepts you."

He looked up. "You do?"

"Yes. Where I used to live," she said, choosing her words very carefully, "Everyone had a very…specific idea of how people should live, and think, and act. There were strict behavioral guidelines that everyone was expected to follow. If you didn't follow those guidelines as well as possible," she made a face, "The others would make your life miserable. I was one of those. Defectives, they're called. It's so terrible that you'd rather not live at all than be a Defective."

Dib was shocked. His problems seemed like small potatoes next to this. He was just weird, as far as his classmates were concerned. But to be considered some kind of mistake, by an entire society? What kind of place was this?

"What were these guidelines?" asked Dib gently.

Kezzi felt a sudden urge to tell the boy everything, from being labeled a Defective, to Tak going missing, to almost being annihilated by the Tallest, everything, right from the beginning. But she couldn't. It would completely ruin her plans. She said, "Well, you were supposed to be heartless, basically. You weren't allowed to fall in love, or make friends, or cry for the dead, or show any kind of soft, weaker emotions. You were expected to show mindless devotion to your superiors. Anyone who showed any kind of weakness was terminated."

Dib felt frantic. What Kezzi was describing sounded like a total hell. He asked, "Where was this place? Is this even legal?"

Kezzi just smiled sadly. "It's very far away from here. I'm sorry, I don't really like to talk about it…"

Dib hung his head in embarrassment._ Of course,_ he thought angrily,_ why would she want to talk about that place? _

Kezzi, reading his angst-filled expression, said, "I can tell you more about it, if you really want to know. I just don't really like thinking about it too much."

Dib said hurriedly, "Oh, no. I don't want to pry any more. I feel like a jerkwad just for asking about it. I should have realized it's too upsetting for you."

"Oh, that's okay. I don't mind your curiosity. In fact, that's one of the things I admire about you."

Dib ears turned pink yet again. "R-Really?"

"Yes. It means you're eager to learn. Besides, I had been keeping all that secret for a long time. It felt good to tell a good listener like you."

Dib said, "I'm glad you understand how I feel…nobody ever understands how I feel, or even tries. You get me like I've never been gotten before."

Kezzi smiled. "I'm glad you feel that way. I never thought we had this much in common. This is the first time in my life I've had friends. Tak and Zim are great to hang out with, too."

Dib said, "Uh, speaking of Zim and Tak…you know they're aliens, right?"

"Yep."

"And, even when you're a Swollen Eyeball agent, you aren't bothered by that?"

"Nope."

Dib felt confused. "Why? Shouldn't you be devoted to catching aliens and monsters and stuff?"

Kezzi sighed. "That's how desperate I am. Like I said, I used to not be allowed to have friends. When I made friends with Tak, well, I was so happy that I didn't even care she was Irken. Neither did I with Zim."

Dib asked, "You do know that Zim is completely bent on the destruction of Earth, right?"

Kezzi laughed humorlessly. "From what Tak tells me about his methods, we don't have much to worry about with him."

Dib smiled. "He hasn't succeeded yet. I always manage to stop him somehow."

Kezzi said, "He'll give up one day, I suppose."

Dib thought a moment, and then said sheepishly, "Hey, you know how you said you had never had friends before?"

"Yeah."

"Well…" Dib squirmed in his seat. 'I never had any friends, either. Tak isn't really a friend , and Zim definitely isn't, but, you are."

He looked up at Kezzi. "Do you consider me a friend?"

Kezzi looked surprised, and then said, "You're definitely my friend, Dib."

Dib smiled again, and said, "Great."

Kezzi said, "I have to get going. My cat needs feeding at home."

Dib said, "Okay. Want me to walk you home?"

"Sure."

The two dumped their empty coffee cups in the trash can on the way out. As they walked down the road, they didn't really talk about any more heavy subjects, just things about skool, their families, their favorite bands, and other things like that. When they got to Kezzi's street, Dib said, "That was fun. We should run into each other more often."

Kezzi grinned. "Yeah. I'll see you around, I guess."

She was turning to leave when Dib said, "Wait."

She turned back around to look at Dib. He was looking very embarrassed. He said, "Look, Kezzi, I know we just met a couple of days ago, and this is going to sound just kinda weird and I don't really know what I'm doing, but…I…I'm…I really like you."

Kezzi stared at him. He had turned scarlet. This was normal, but why did she herself feel her cheeks warming slightly? She sort of jumped around inside for a moment, and said, "Um, I really have to feed my cat."

"But-"

She was already running down the street. She called out behind her, "Sorry, Dib! I'll see you Monday!"

She didn't stop running until she reached her house. She flung the door open and slammed it shut behind her. Tak was sitting at the kitchen table. She asked, "Where have you been? Are you working on getting to know Dib? It's very important that you do."

Remembering the destructive plot she and her sister had put into action sent a wave of guilt over Kezzi. Nevertheless, she kept a straight face and said, "Yes. He completely trusts me. Now you have to befriend Zim."

Tak scowled. "I'm working on it…Good Irk, he'll be a nightmare…"

Kezzi said nothing and went upstairs. For the rest of the day, the two went about their business in Kezzi's base. When evening came, Tak left to go to her enormous base in the city, leaving Kezzi alone again. After dinner, she went down to her room and sat in front of her huge computer. She logged in to the Swollen Eyeball. A silhouette with red eyes greeted her. Kezzi said, "Agent Nessie? Could you connect me to Agent Mothman?"

"Certainly, Agent Poltergeist. One moment, please."

The screen went black, and Dib's familiar shape showed up. He stared at the screen. "Kezzi? Oh, uh, look, I'm sorry about-"

She cut him off. "It's okay. Actually, I wanted to say…"

He waited. "Yes?"

"I wanted to say…I really like you, too."

Silence. Then, "…You do?"

"Yes."

Dib said in a barely audible whisper, "Great. Uh, goodnight, then."

"Yeah. Goodnight."

He logged out. The screen was blank.

Still shocked that she'd actually said it, Kezzi fell backwards onto her bed and snuggled into the sheets. _There is no way I'm going to destroy him now,_ she thought. _It doesn't matter anymore if I show these emotions. I'm not on Irk anymore. I can decide how to feel .And I can't destroy Dib. I just can't do it. I won't. Not for anything._

_Not even for Tak._


	6. Complications

Again, thanks for the reviews! Waffles for:

ClockWerkOrange, HannahGee13, The Mortician's Daughter, GazmRules, Sweet Possum, and Black Dragon41. Enjoy Chapter 6! W00T!

Chapter 6: Complications

The next day, Tak woke up in her base at about 8 o' clock and immediately went down to her base's third floor. Inside was a duplicate of the huge pill in Kezzi's base, with the liquids contained in huge metal tanks. Tak had done some research on earth chemicals and discovered that when the two she had, called ammonia and chlorine, were combined and turned into gas, they would make an extremely deadly poison called mustard gas. It was the perfect thing to bring the human race to its knees.

But she mustn't get ahead of herself, Tak told herself. If this plan were to succeed, she first had to get the only people that could possibly be in her way to let their guard down. Those two people were Zim and Dib. Dib was already taken care of, thanks to Kezzi, but she still had to make friends with Zim, something that made her want to vomit. But it had to be done.

She went back up to the first floor and dialed Zim's number on the phone. After a couple of rings, a very deep voice answered. "Hello? Who is this and why have you called my perfectly normal human home?"

Tak rolled her eyes. He was so obvious. "It's me, Zim. You can take off that ridiculous voice disguise."

"Oh." After a moment, Zim's real voice answered. "Tak? Why are you calling?"

For a moment Tak found it difficult to respond. She hadn't really thought about what she would say when she called him. Suddenly, she remembered what Kezzi had said. "I was thinking, well, since we're allies now, we could team up in your plot for world conquest. I believe you hate this ball of dirt just as much as I do."

A stunned silence met Tak's ears. Then, loudly, "YES! Tak shall team up with the amazing ZIM! Nothing can stop the force of two united Irkens! We shall CONQUER! We shall RULE! We shall-"

"I get it, I get it!" Tak yelled, before she went deaf. "But we won't get anywhere if we don't have the proper technology. We should share our weapons. Maybe we can look at each other's devices and decide what we can best use."

Zim said, "Yes, of course. I will generously lend you the best my base has to offer. Feel honored that you are at the service of Zim's incredible technology."

Tak was getting hugely irritated with his ego, but she said, "Great. I'll be over in a bit to check it out."

"All right. Goodbye, Tak."

He hung up. Tak laid the phone back on the hook and groaned. How on Irk would she stand him? She almost couldn't wait to blast him to pieces with a laser. On the other hand, his planet-sized ego and attitude, while massively annoying, could be sort of endearing. It was amusing to watch him scream at the drop of a hat. She felt a bit guilty, plotting all of this right under his non-existent nose.

_Why would I feel that way?_ She asked herself. He ruined her whole freaking life, and then left her marooned in Earth's orbit for nearly a year. While it made her want to rip his squeedilyspooch out, she had to admire that kind of ability for making chaos.

Tak shook her head in frustration. _That little beast is _not_ my friend. I will annihilate every last cell in his body, just like he deserves._

Having stiffened her resolve, she called to Mimi. They both put on their disguises and marched out the door. When they came to Zim's house, walking past the stupid ornaments and the security gnomes, she rang the doorbell. She heard a bunch of yelling and scuffling inside. Quite clearly, she heard, "BAD GIR! DO NOT STUFF MASHED POTATOES IN ZIM'S PAK!"

The door flew open, revealing a very harassed-looking Zim. His wig was lopsided, and one contact lens was falling out. Indeed, his PAK seemed to be filled with drippy mashed potatoes. Tak asked, "Uh…is this a bad time?"

He shouted, "No! You shall see my technology, no matter what! Come in! I will be having my PAK cleaned in the meantime."

Tak walked inside the familiar, bizarre home. She deactivated her disguise, and Zim took off his wig and lenses. He went off in the corner to have his PAK washed by two robotic arms coming out of a side table. All at once, a robot woman wearing a tutu shot out a door and stopped straight in front of Tak. "Welcome home, son!" It said.

Tak raised an invisible brow. Zim called to it, "Robomom! Leave! NOW!"

The robot rolled back through the door it had come from. Tak said to Zim, "You really need to work on the security here. It's pathetically obvious that these 'parents' of yours are robots. I could give you a hand with making it more believable."

Zim snorted. "Nonsense! Zim's base is ingenious!"

He thought a moment and then said, "On the other hand…if Tak could help make it even better…I suppose I will let you help me."

Tak was surprised. Zim had never let anybody help him before. "Can I see your weapons now?"

"Of course. Come with Zim."

They walked over to the elevator. Zim pressed a button that took them to the fourth floor. Zim said, "Feel grateful, Tak. It's not often that people get such amazing help with their missions as that of Zim!"

"But, I'm helping you, remember?"

"Well...I…SILENCE!"

Tak suppressed a giggle. When they reached the fourth floor, the doors opened to reveal many rows of deadly Irken technology. _I had no idea Zim had such dangerous weapons,_ thought Tak._ I could actually use these…_

"Come. Zim shall show you around his collection of mighty Irken weaponry."

They walked through the many aisles, inspecting the most deadly lasers, cannons, and bombs he had. Zim kept asking what she thought would be most useful in destroying Earth. But her mind wasn't really on it. She couldn't think of anything but the fact that the proud, haughty Zim was actually accepting the help of his former worst enemy. Was he able to forgive so quickly? It made Tak feel bad for holding such a grudge.

"Tak? Tak-thing!"

She was startled out of her thoughts by Zim, looking at her expectantly. "Well? Which weapon will be the best in our plot for world conquest?"

Tak thought a moment, and said, "I can't choose. Maybe we should use them all."

Zim smiled. "Good idea. Tak shall make an excellent minion for Zim! You and I will be the almighty rulers of this planet!"

Tak said nothing. She felt puzzled. Why did she feel pleasure under his praise? It wasn't as if she cared what he thought about her.

The two went back up to the first floor in the elevator. Tak finally worked up the courage to ask, "Why are you accepting my help?"

Zim pondered for a moment. Then he said, "Ordinarily, I would never let you help me. But…" he said, bIushing slightly, "I think of you as the first friend I ever had."

Tak's eyes widened. She felt her cheeks blush light emerald. "Really?" she asked?

"Yes. I seem to have a talent for making enemies rather than friends, so it's rare that anybody comes close to being my friend. Unless you count GIR, but he was sort of assigned to be my friend. Nobody has ever really liked me for any reason."

Tak said, "But Irkens aren't supposed to feel a need for friends. Only Defectives ever have those emotions."

Zim said, "I'm starting to worry about that. I know I shouldn't feel like this, but it's just been getting stronger. I've been telling myself that it's just the Earth atmosphere affecting me, but…"

He trailed off. The elevator doors slid open, and the two stepped into the living room. Tak had been so caught up in her thoughts for the past half-hour that she hadn't noticed Mimi had stayed behind. She was sitting with GIR very close to the TV. GIR turned around and squealed, "Hi, Master! Hi, Purply!"

On the TV was the same romance movie that was on the other day. Zim asked, "What are they doing?"

Tak tried to recall what Dib had told her. She said, "I think it's called a kiss. It's something humans do when they love each other…"

She expected Zim to say something about Irkens not needing such soft feelings and so on, but he just looked at her. She looked back at him, about to say something, but the next thing she knew, Zim had leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers.

She felt as though a jolt of electricity had shot through her body. She blushed madly and pulled away in shock. Zim stared at her for a moment and said, "Uh…"

Tak looked around frantically and changed back into her disguise. Seeing her master change, Mimi did the same. She tried to say something to Zim, but all that came out was, "I…I have to…"

She ran off with Mimi, back to her base. When she got there, she ran up to her room as fast as she could and flung herself down on the bed. She sat there for almost an hour, her thoughts a jumbled mess._ Why would he do that? Is he trying to say he loves me? Even if he did, why would I care? How am I supposed to destroy him now? What will I tell Kezzi? I shouldn't be feeling like this. Irkens…don't feel love…_

Her thoughts were interrupted by her doorbell ringing. She got up and went downstairs to answer it. When she opened the door, a small, roundish, mooselike thing was hovering right in front of her face.

"Squee!" said the thing. Tak noticed that it was holding a note in its front nubs. She took it from it, and read,

Tak,

I am sorry I scared you with the human affection ritual. I was trying to say that I have chosen you to be my love-pig, for real this time. I would like to rule the Earth with you. I hope you will accept.

Zim

P.S. This is my other minion, Minimoose.

Tak read the note over and over again, trying to find some hidden meaning, some sort of threat, anything that sounded remotely like the Zim she had grown to hate. But it was, clear and straightforward, a confession of love. For a moment, she forgot how to breathe. She looked up at Minimoose and said, "Um…thank you."

"Squee!" it said again, and flew off. Tak went back to her room, reading the note. _One thing is for sure,_ she thought,_ the plan is ruined. I could never bring myself to destroy Zim now. Kezzi will kill me. She put this entire operation together for me, just to give me another chance. I would go through with it if it didn't involve killing Zim. How can I possibly tell her…I love him…?_

She fell into a deep sleep, and dreamed of Zim all night.


	7. Failure

Thanks for the reviews, people! Especially HannahGee13, Gazmrules, Black Dragon41, The Mortician's Daughter, ClockwerkOrange, IZ Fan, warriorsfan12528, Stargazer128, and Blueberry C. Waffles for all!

Sorry this chapter took so freakin' long! 8th grade REALLY sucks when you're trying to write stuff. But anyway, enjoy Chapter 7!

Chapter 7: Failure

The sun rose in the ruby red sky on Monday morning. The day began like any other for both Zim and Dib. They both went about their business in their homes, and then they went walking to skool. The two crossed paths at the street corner next to Bloaty's. Dib looked around and asked, "Where are Tak and Kezzi?"

Zim shrugged. "I couldn't care less where that pork-beast Kezzi is. As for Tak…"

He caught himself in time, but not before a light emerald blush appeared on his face. Dib looked at him quizzically and asked, "Uh…So, did you see Tak over the weekend?"

Zim blushed harder. "Shut up, Dib-hog!" he spat. "Why is it any of YOUR business whether I saw her or not?"

They stood for a few moments in silence, with Zim fuming and Dib scrutinizing him carefully. Suddenly he said, "You like Tak, don't you?"

Zim looked as though he had been pinched. "WHAAAT!"

Dib just smirked. Zim shouted, "You're one to talk! Half the time you're practically slobbering over Kezzi and your giant head resembles a tomato! It disgusts me!"

Dib shouted back, "Yeah? Well, you're the one who's always going on about how Irkens don't feel love and have no need for those stupid, weak emotions and crap! Can you say hypocrisy?"

It had turned into an all-out shouting match. Kids on their way to skool were gathering around them and chorusing, "Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!"

Zim, who had no idea what was going on, asked, "What do these slime monkeys want?"

"They're telling us to fight. They want us to beat each other up!"

"Really? Don't mind if I do!"

Zim took a flying leap at Dib, who neatly dodged him. He took off his backpack, which was full of heavy textbooks, and swung it at Zim with all his might. It caught him in the gut, and he doubled over wheezing. The crowd cheered. But Zim wasn't about to be outdone. He swung a fist at his opponent and connected with his jawbone. Dib staggered backward. Stars winked in front of his eyes for a moment. He shook it off and charged at Zim, socking him just below the eye. Then they became aware of some kind of commotion in the back of the crowd. A few kids gave cries of pain and ran off, and a familiar accented voice screeched, "WHAT IN THE NAME OF MIYUKI IS GOING ON HERE?"

Someone shoved their way through the crowd and pulled Zim and Dib apart. It was Kezzi. She stared at the two for a moment in shock and said, "What…"

Dib sputtered, "Kezzi! I…uh…"

She let them both go. Six or seven kids were still milling around, waiting to see what would happen. Kezzi shot them a killing stare and they hurried away. She turned to Zim and Dib. "Why were you going at each other's throats like that? You caused a huge shambles. What's going on?" she demanded.

Dib stared at his feet, but Zim said, "I was simply commenting on Dib-human's inexplicable affection for you, when he went berserk and attempted to combat me."

Kezzi gasped. Dib flinched. Zim continued, "Anyway, Kezzi, why aren't you heading to human skool? You came from the opposite direction that we usually walk."

Kezzi had a sort of deer-in-the-headlights look for a moment, but she forced a smile and said, "Oh…I'm not feeling so well today, so…"

Dib said, "But you looked fine a second ago. Why would you be out if you feel sick?"

Kezzi looked around frantically and blurted, "Well, um, um. Uh, my dad believes that fresh air is good for a cold, so I'm just, ah, taking a little walk."

Zim raised an invisible eyebrow and said, "You're a terrible liar, Kezzi."

She gritted her teeth and growled, "Argh! It's none of your business, Zim!"

With that, she shoved past the two and down the sidewalk. Dib asked, "What was that all about?"

Zim gave a careless shrug and said, "Who knows? Let's go, we're about to be late."

Kezzi was pounding down the sidewalk, past McMeaty's and the mall. Her mind raced. _They were fighting because of me,_ she thought._ I've screwed things up even worse now. I'm such a failure. I just wanted to help my sister, but I've wound up falling in love with a human and causing him to fight with one of my own kind. Everything is slowly being ruined._

She ran until she reached the huge, futuristic base on the outskirts of town. Ignoring the man staffed at the front, screaming, "DELISHUS WEENIE!" she stepped into an elevator and went up to the fourth floor. When the elevator doors opened, they revealed Tak sitting in a chair at the far end of the room, staring off into space. She jumped a mile when she saw Kezzi standing there. "Ack! Um, Kezzi! I wasn't expecting you until later…"

She was looking extremely agitated. Her eyes looked like she hadn't slept well and her antennae were slightly askew. Kezzi asked, "You're a fright. What's wrong?"

Tak hesitated before answering. "First, let me ask you this. How is it going with you and Dib? Any…problems?"

Kezzi's heart jumped. She could feel herself blushing. _Crap,_ she thought. _I really am a terrible liar._

Nevertheless, she plastered a smile on her face and said, "No, no problems. Anything to, uh, report with Zim?"

Tak looked away. "Nothing in particular."

They didn't speak for a while after that. Tak was thinking to herself, _So she has the same problem as me. Fantastic. This whole operation has come to a screeching halt._

Meanwhile, Kezzi was thinking, _Looks like I'm the only one screwing up here. She obviously has no feelings for Zim whatsoever._ _That's the way it's been my entire life, hasn't it? Me, being a complete failure._

She felt tears well up in her eyes. Without warning, she stood up, ran to the elevator, and left the base. She cried silently the whole way home. When she reached her base, she burst through the door and ran into the kitchen. All at once, every one of the memories she had been trying so hard to forget rushed out and attacked her. Being labeled a Defective from birth, being abused and neglected by her own neighbors, losing her parents, losing her sister, all those horrible memories washed over her and she crumpled to the floor. Scarcely aware of what she was doing, she walked to the nearest drawer and pulled out a knife.

She turned off her disguise. _I don't deserve to be an Invader._

She ripped out her PAK. _I don't deserve to be Irken._

She pressed the knife against her wrist. _I don't deserve to be alive._

Kezzi made a small cut on her wrist. Dark green blood oozed out. She kept making more and more cuts, and with each one she hated herself with every bone in her body.

_This is for Kezzi the failure._

Slit

_Kezzi the freak._

Slit

_Kezzi the weakling._

Slit

_Kezzi the idiot._

Slit

_Kezzi the worthless._

Slit

_Kezzi the Defective._

Slit

Slit

Slit

She wasn't sure how many cuts she had made, but she could feel the blood seeping down her arm, pounding in her head and dripping on the floor. Her vision was growing blurry and she couldn't stand up. She knew that she was dying.

_Good, _she thought viciously. _Tak is better off without me. She can have this planet. I just wish I could…_

She slumped to the floor as her consciousness slipped away._ It was nice while it lasted…_

_Goodbye, Dib. I love you._


	8. Race To Beat the Clock

Yeah, so I'm writing again. I kinda took a little break. But thank you for all the freaked reviews, HannahGee13, ClockwerkOrange, warriorsfan12528, GazmRules, Zarth-Krayt, The Mortician's Daughter, and supertinagirl6! Here's chappie 8!

Chapter 8: Race to Beat the Clock

The first thing Kezzi was aware of was a throbbing pain in her arm. _That's impossible, _she thought. _I'm dead. I can't feel pain. _

She felt as though she were lying on a mattress. Very confused, she tried to sit up. A voice in the distance said, "Don't try that just yet. You lost a lot of blood. Just lie down."

Kezzi thought the voice sounded familiar. She attempted to lift her head to see who it was, but she could scarcely move. As her vision cleared, she became aware of somebody sponging her forehead off with a cool washcloth. She turned to look at them, and two gold eyes behind large, circular glasses stared down at her.

"…Dib?" she croaked.

He nodded. "You're going to be okay. I bandaged up your arm and now all you need to do is rest."

She studied him. There was something different in his eyes than usual. It was…hurt? No, more like regret. She was about to ask what was wrong, when she realized with a jolt of horror that her disguise was deactivated. "Dib, I–uh, this is…"

He cut her off. "I know. As soon as I saw you lying on the floor, I knew it was you."

"Why did you come here?"

He hesitated. "Well, you looked upset this morning, so I decided to come here after skool was over to see if you were okay."

Kezzi felt her eyes tear up. He had been so kind to her, and this was how she repaid him. She whispered, "I didn't want you to find out like this. I wanted to tell you…"

"I'm not upset about that. I was starting to have my suspicions anyway. I just feel like a complete idiot."

"Why?"

Dib thought for a moment. "Well, to tell you the truth, this has happened to me before. I actually used to like Tak before Zim sent her into orbit. It's crazy…every girl I've fallen for so far has turned out to be Irken. But you never felt that way, did you?"

Kezzi was a bit taken aback. "Of course I did. Don't you remember? I told you in Starbucks that I was a Defective. Irken Defectives can feel emotions like that."

Dib looked shocked. In his mind he was putting the puzzle pieces together. He remembered that day at lunch, when Zim had screamed:

"_Irkens have no need for friends! Have you no pride in your species? Are you a Defective?"_

"Of course," he murmured, "Why did I not realize it before?"

Kezzi sat up slowly. She looked at her bandaged arm. "I feel terrible for not telling you. After you've been so nice to me…"

Dib smiled. "I just feel stupid for not figuring it out sooner. The clues were so obvious: you showing up out of nowhere with Tak, who I know is Irken, you telling me about being a Defective. I'm supposed to be a paranormal investigator, and I don't even know an alien when I see one."

He ran a hand through his hair. Then he asked, "Why did you come here in the first place?"

Suddenly, Kezzi knew she had to tell him everything. She knew that what she and Tak were planning was wrong and she could never go through with it. So she told him of the plan to poison the entire city, and the rest of the world, and to kill Zim and Dib in the meantime. After she finished, Dib simply stared at her. "You were planning…to kill me?"

Kezzi nodded miserably. "But, no matter how hard I tried to tell myself that I shouldn't be so weak, I couldn't do it. I cared too much for you…"

They both blushed. Kezzi gasped and asked, "What time is it?"

Dib looked at his watch. "Uh, it's late. Almost 11."

Kezzi's eyes widened. "Oh, no. Dib, the reason I was absent from skool today was that I was going to help Tak set up the bomb in her base."

"And?"

"The bombs are set to go off at midnight! The one in my third floor is already set up! I'll bet you anything Tak is setting the timer in her base right now!"

Dib stood up. "We have no time to lose. Go turn off your bomb; we have to get to Tak's base, now!"

Kezzi bolted out of her room and got in the elevator. When she reached the third floor, Phobos was there overseeing the bomb's functioning. She asked, "What's wrong, Mistress?"

"Change of plans. We can't do this. Defuse the bomb, Phobos."

"As you wish, Mistress."

Phobos turned to the timer on the front of the bomb, pressed a few buttons, and a mechanical voice said, "Explosive deactivated."

Kezzi went back down to her room where Dib was still sitting. He asked, "Is it off?"

"Yes. Let's get to Tak's. It'll be faster if we take my Voot cruiser."

Dib nodded, and they were about to run when they heard the phone ring. Kezzi answered it, and Tak's voice said, "Kezzi, I just received a signal that the bomb in your base has been deactivated."

Kezzi said, "It has. Tak, listen–"

"No need to explain. I know perfectly well what's going on. I'm calling to let you know that I have no intention of aborting this mission. I can take over Earth myself. Goodbye, Kezzi."

There was a click on the other end, and then silence.

Kezzi stood, stunned for a moment. Dib asked, "What's wrong?"

She whispered, "Tak is going through with this."

She turned around and shouted, "We have to stop her! Let's go!"

The two took the elevator up to the top floor, where they walked across a small bridge to get to the platform that held Kezzi's silver-and-black Voot cruiser. They hopped in, Kezzi fired the rockets, and they shot through the passage had opened up in the roof.

It was a race to beat the clock. The two had no idea if they would win.

Meanwhile, Zim had just left his base in his own Voot cruiser. He had left in a very big hurry after hearing a message that Tak had left for him on his phone. It had said,

"_It's all over now. I'm sorry, Zim."_


	9. It's Okay To Feel Weak

OMG…this is the next-to-last chapter. Penultimate waffles for GazmRules, XxDoomygrlxX, ClockwerkOrange, HannahGee13, warriorsfan12528, Zarth-Krayt, The Mortician's Daughter, supertinagirl6, and Fantasy017. Everyone enjoy!

Chapter 9: It's Okay To Feel Weak

Kezzi and Dib zoomed over the city in her silver Voot cruiser. The cloaking device was on, so they passed unnoticed by the humans below. Kezzi was scarcely paying attention to where she was going and almost flew into a very tall tree.

"Gah! Kezzi…" Dib complained.

"Sorry. I'm just really nervous."

Several tense minutes passed, with the engine on full speed. Finally, they came to the huge purple building on the edge of the city. Kezzi slowed down and landed on the roof. The duo got out, and then noticed another, very familiar cruiser parked there as well.

"What is Zim doing here at this hour?" Dib asked incredulously.

"Dunno…" Kezzi looked at her watch and gasped. It was 11:30 already. They had only half an hour to find the bomb and deactivate it.

"There's no time to lose. Let's go!" shouted Kezzi. They ran over to the roof's elevator and stepped inside. They were skimming downwards when suddenly, the elevator slowed to a stop and a mechanical voice said, "Intruder detected. Commencing self-destruct in 10…9…"

The two looked at each other in horror. Then Kezzi yelled, "An escape hatch! GO!"

She opened up a small door in the bottom of the elevator, shoved Dib through, and then dove out behind him. The lift exploded above her, propelling her towards Dib. She grabbed hold of his hand as they plummeted own the shaft, and then something caught her in midair. Confused, she looked behind her and saw that two of the legs from her PAK had shot out and grabbed the bottom of a doorway. She said, "Huh? But I thought I ripped out my PAK…"

"Uh, Kezzi? Maybe we should concentrate on getting through that door…"

"Oh, yeah. Hold on tight."

Dib's hands clenched her wrists as the two spider legs pulled them through the door to safety. As they flopped onto the floor, Dib explained, "I reattached your PAK to you while you were unconscious. I thought you would need it."

Kezzi didn't know what to say. "Wow…um, thanks…"

"No problem. What the heck was that whole self-destruct thingy up there? I've used the elevators in here before, and they never did anything like that."

Kezzi said, "I think Tak installed that defense mechanism because she didn't want anybody interfering with her plans."

"So she blows us up, is that it?"

Kezzi looked at the ground. "I can't believe she would do that. I'm her sister…"

There was a brief silence that was broken by Dib asking, "Where is the bomb, most likely?"

"I know for a fact that it's on the third floor. I'm just not sure which floor we're on now."

A familiar voice cut in, "We're on the seventh floor, dirt-pigs."

They both turned to see Zim standing over them. Dib ran up to him. "Okay Zim, what are you doing here?" he demanded.

"Relax, Dib-worm. I'm just looking for Tak. She left me a message on my phone, saying she was sorry. About what, I haven't the faintest idea."

Kezzi and Dib exchanged glances. Then Kezzi briefly explained the plot that she had cooked up with Tak. When she finished, to no one's surprise, Zim started screaming. "I KNEW IT! I KNEW SHE WAS PLANNING SOMETHING! How could she? I thought we were allies! And after I told her-"

Zim caught himself and blushed furiously. Kezzi asked, "What did you tell her?"

Zim thought for a moment. "Well, I wanted to let her know that, well," he blushed harder, "I seem to have developed rather strong feelings for her. But it appears that she has no such feelings for me."

Kezzi asked, "Do have any idea where she is?"

"Most likely, she is on the third floor, with this bomb you speak of."

Kezzi looked at her watch again. had less than 15 minutes. "Let's go!"

The three ran to the elevator on the other side of the room, when Dib said, "Wait! We can't take an elevator; it'll explode! Is there any other way?"

Kezzi shook her head.

They stood stumped for a moment before Zim said, "WAIT! I have an idea!"

He pressed the button to open the door, and tentatively walked inside. He looked up and in the corner of the ceiling was a small bomb. The flashing lights indicated that it was detecting another intruder. Without warning, Zim leaped up, seized the bomb, and screamed, "HEADS UP!"

He flung the activated explosive across the room, where it skittered on the floor and stopped. They all piled into the elevator as fast as they could and pressed the third floor button. Just as the doors closed, they saw the little bomb explode with an eardrum-rattling bang. After what seemed like a very long time, they reached the third floor.

In the center of the room was the huge capsule, now completed, with a huge digital timer strapped to the front of it. There were less than ten minutes left. Standing in front of the bomb, armed with an Irken plasma-ray, looking murderous, was Tak.

She smiled grimly. "So you finally made it here. Good. This wasn't going to be any fun without you. Kezzi, I suggest you find a gas mask within the next seven minutes, because this poison can hurt Irkens as well as humans. Zim and Dib, however, don't get gas masks. They're overdue to die, you see."

Kezzi stepped forward and said, "If Dib is going to die, then I guess I will too."

Zim and Dib looked at her in surprise. Tak sneered. "It's because you love your precious little Dib, isn't it? Those weak emotions will be the death of you, Kezzi. Abandon them and join me. We will do what Irkens were created to do: destroy."

Kezzi shook her head. "No, Tak. _You_ abandon _your_ feelings. They aren't what you really feel, are they?"

Tak was caught by surprise. Hey eyes narrowed and she hissed, "I had no feelings in the first place. Feelings drag you down. They consume you and suffocate you. If I am emotionless, I am free."

"But are you happy that way?"

Tak looked up. Something was stirring inside her. She told her self that no matter what they said, she would not give in.

"Do you honestly think this is what you were meant to do?"

Tak growled. "I don't need happiness. I only need to serve my people."

"You're kidding yourself, Tak. The Tallest probably don't even remember you. Irk just _doesn't matter anymore._ I was miserable there. Coming to Earth was the best thing that ever happened to me."

She took a breath and then said, "Meeting Dib was the best thing that ever happened to me."

Suddenly, Tak screamed, "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"

She took hold of her gun and said, "You've failed me, Kezzi. If you can't destroy Dib, then I will!"

She pulled the trigger, and a ray of acid green light struck Dib. He was flung to the far end of the room and then slumped to the ground.

Kezzi stood numbly for a moment, and then screamed, "DIIIIIB!"

She sprinted over to him. The plasma was burning his clothes and skin away. Kezzi did her best to wipe it off, and then took off his trench coat and wrapped it around the wound.

Dib croaked, "…Kezzi?"

"Yes?"

"Did you…mean what you just said?"

"Of course I did."

He smiled weakly. "I feel the same way…"

He turned his face toward her, and gently kissed her on the cheek.

Meanwhile, Zim was confronting Tak. He said, "I used to think the way you did. I thought I needed no stupid feelings…but I think I'm happier with them, Tak."

"I know that makes me a Defective. But I don't care. I'm not on Irk anymore, so it doesn't matter. Here, you can't be arrested for loving someone."

That nagging feeling stirred inside Tak again. She remembered that day in Zim's base, where he had kissed her…what did she feel then? _I felt nothing_, she told herself, but another part of her said otherwise. And when he had sent the note, choosing me to be his 'love pig' for real, she had deliberately thought, _"How can I tell her…I love him?"_

She shook her head, though the gesture was very feeble. "Zim…"

He continued relentlessly. "I've found that it's better to feel weak, soft emotions, if they are really what you feel, than to be heartless and invulnerable. It's okay to feel weak, Tak…"

_No…no! _ She thought frantically. She could feel herself giving in. She remembered the first time she had come to Earth, when he had tried all kinds of ridiculous human methods to get her to fall for him…how her life, ever since that horrible day at Devastis, when he had blacked out half the planet, how her life had revolved around him ever since then, how sad and angry she had felt when she finally found him, and he didn't even recognize her…could it have been that this whole entire time…?

"I want you to have emotions. I want you to be able…to love me…"

Tak just felt numb. She looked down at the timer. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6…

She bent down and shut off the bomb. All was silent.

She sank to her knees. Tears were streaming down her face. Zim knelt in front of her. She looked up at him and buried her face in his shoulders, sobbing hysterically.

Kezzi and Dib watched from the other side of the room. They both breathed a sigh of relief. They knew it would all be alright.

Tak thought, as she cried on Zim's shoulder, _Kezzi was right. I am happier this way._

_For the first time in my life, I am happy._


	10. Defective Together

It's the finale of my first fanfic. Thank you all for reading this story and for all the great reviews. I would especially like to thank HannahGee13 for being my bestest buddy. Also ClockwerkOrange(you crack me up) supertinagirl, The Mortician's Daughter, GazmRules, Fantasy017, warriorsfan12 528,and XxDoomygrlxX. Sorry if this seems really sappy, but it's a romance, what can I say? You all get finale waffles to eat as this story draws to a close. Enjoy.

Chapter 10: Defective Together

It was about a quarter past midnight. Tak, due to the stress and emotional breakdown, had fallen asleep. Zim was saying to Dib and Kezzi, "I'll take her up to her room. Now get out of here."

Dib protested, "How do we know you won't try to set off the bomb while you're here? I'm not budging an inch until-"

"Oh, Dib, he'd probably just screw it up anyway. We both need to go home." Kezzi cut him off.

She switched her disguise on. Dib pouted but allowed himself to be dragged out of the base. On the way down, Kezzi asked, "How's that burn?"

"Huh? Oh. It stings, but it's not that bad."

"Good. It should heal in about a week."

Once out into the night air, Kezzi looked up at the full moon and said, "You know, Irk is nowhere near as pretty as Earth."

Dib looked at her. "Really?"

"Mm-hmm. There's so much pollution there, and neon lights and traffic. I know Earth has a lot of that too, but nowhere near as much. Of course, I'd get arrested for saying things like that there. I think that's my favorite thing about this place: individuality and free will."

There was a brief silence. Then Dib asked, "Hey, Kezzi? If you were labeled a Defective, then why didn't the Tallest kill you?"

She said sadly, "Because I held back. I tried as hard as I could to make myself fit in. But one day I just snapped. I couldn't take it anymore, not being who I wanted to be…"

She trailed off. The moonlight shone snow white on her pale face as they walked down the sidewalk. Cars rolled by, crickets chirped in a nearby forest. Suddenly she turned to Dib and said, "I know for sure I'm happier this way. I know I'll never go back to Irk again. If that means I have to stay in this disguise for the rest of my life, fine. But I'm not leaving you, ever."

Dib stared at her. "Do you really mean that?"

Kezzi slid her hand into his. "I'm absolutely, completely serious. I'm glad I'm a Defective, Dib, because it means I can have feelings for you. They're the best feelings I've ever felt."

Another silence fell in which the two just stared into each other's eyes, silver and gold in a silent promise to always be together. Then Kezzi grinned and said, "Race ya to my street."

She bolted ahead of Dib, who followed, laughing. In the back of his mind, he knew something totally ridiculous was happening to him. He had fallen in love with an Irken, his sworn enemy's kind. But he didn't care. Remembering Kezzi's words from earlier, he let himself feel his weaker emotions, because they were what he really felt. It was the best he had ever felt.

Meanwhile, back in the huge purple building the two had just left, Zim was watching over Tak as she slept. Looking down at her, Zim thought she actually looked peaceful. He had never seen her look that way before. She had looked enraged, sad, arrogant, put never peaceful. Until now.

"Nn…"

Zim glanced at her. Slowly, her deep violet eyes opened. Her vision cleared, and she saw the familiar figure standing next to her bed. She squinted and said, "Zim?"

He nodded. Tears welled up in her eyes. She whispered, "I'm so sorry…"

There was no reply. Tak felt herself die a little inside. There was no way he would forgive her, after all she did to him. "You must hate me now, right?"

Zim raised an invisible eyebrow. "Are you kidding? I never would have thought of using a poison bomb against the human stink-meats. You have to teach me these things."

Tak stared at him. She sat up on the bed. "You mean you aren't mad that I nearly killed you?"

He shook his head. "Others have come much closer than you. Besides, I guess I deserved for you to despise me as much as you did. I put you through so much…"

Tak said softly, "But I don't despise you. Not anymore."

Zim turned around to look at her. "Really?"

"No. Come to think of it, I'm not sure I ever really did. Ever since I first saw you on Devastis, and you caused that blackout, I had been searching for you. For decades I tried to track you down. My entire life revolved around finding you. I remember when I first came here, and how shattered I felt when you didn't even recognize me. I told myself that I hated you with every particle of my being, but I believe I was just fooling myself."

She lapsed into silence. After a moment Zim asked, "But doesn't that make you a Defective?"

"If it does, I don't really care. This is Earth, after all. The Tallest aren't here to tell us how to live our life. They always said that Irkens don't feel love. But that's a lie. It's in our nature to feel like that. The Tallest are just trying to stifle it. But we don't have to stifle it anymore. I don't want to be heartless if it means I can't be happy."

Zim asked, "You realize that you are casting away everything that makes you an Irken by deciding this. You are showing complete disrespect for your planet and species. If you tried to apply to become an invader, you'd be laughed at and then vaporized. Is that…what you really want?"

"Yes." Tak stood up. "I now see that I never wanted to be an invader. All I wanted was to be loved…"

She paused and stared into Zim's ruby red eyes. "I feel like you're the only one…that's capable of loving me."

Many moments passed as the two aliens looked into each other's eyes. Then, slowly, Zim leaned forward and kissed Tak gently on the mouth.

This time, Tak didn't pull away. Her eyes widened in surprise, but then they closed as she wrapped her arms around Zim. Finally, she felt as though someone truly cared for her, not for her military purposes, but for her.

Then, Zim broke the kiss and looked down at her. "You see? Zim is capable of loving even the Tak-thing. I do not care that we are both Defectives if we can be Defective together."

Tak smiled. "Neither do I."

She nuzzled her head against Zim's shoulder. She felt that she had finally achieved what she wanted most in life. But in the back of their minds, they both knew that if they were caught like this on Irk, they would be put through the worst torment imaginable. They would face the pain, ridicule, and neglect that all Defectives faced. Finally, they would be destroyed. Destroyed for loving someone.

But they weren't on Irk anymore. So it didn't matter.


End file.
